STURDY on FILM

by

Jack Strudy "Eddie Macon's Run"

I've seen more exciting runs in pantyhose. John Schneider shot this poorly crafted film while on hiatus from "The Dukes of Hazzard" due to a contract dispute. From the looks of things, Scheinder should be glad he has that weekly Bo Duke income to fall back on; his attempted transition to the silver screen is a bust.

It's not that Scheinder doesn't have screen persona he does, but his script selection exposes his weakness as an actor. Car-bashing TV theatrics are one thing, but drama is something else again.

Scheinder plays Eddie Macon, a husband and father wrongfully imprisoned by a vengeful boss who attemped to skim money from Eddie's pay check. Eddie pushes the forman around a little just a little -and gets 20 years, a light Texas sentence.

He has managed to break out once prior to the film's opening, but made the mistake that many men in the "big house" repeat: he went directly home. Ther standing on the front porch, were his loving wife Chris (Leah Ayers) and policeman Carl Marzack (Kirk Douglas). Marzack brings him back to prison.

Eddie, not your typical prison dummy, learns from his mistake. His second attempt (the title "Run") is planned with deft precision. He sends wife Chris and son Bobby to Mexico to await the appointed hour of his arrival. I told you this was a precision getaway.

Eddie's plan is to run three Successive marathon distances in three nights to the Mexican border, where he will met wifey and son and live happily ever after. Would you say that the plot is the maximum streching of credibility? After all, worldclass runners would be unable to pace themselves over uneven terrain for three nights in a similar situation. Or, consider the fact that our hero never ran before. In true

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TV movie style, screenwriter Jeff Kanew glosses over stumbling blocks known in the trade as credibility factors.

Not only does Eddie have Carl "Ialways-get-my-man" Marzack pursuing him, but runs (all puns intended) into a plethora of problems, including the traditional redneck, the wealthy Potts family who believe him to be a cattle rustler (how many rustlers wear Nike joggers and Head tanktops?), and a vicious moccasin (the snake, not the loafer). That attacks him while he swims naked across a river the visual highlight of this movie.

At least Scheinder had hard terrain to run across. Character Eddie Macon breaks both legs running on a script that has more potholes than a New York City street. Screenwriter Kanew's tale is peppered with an inordinate number of excruciating flashbacks that add to the tedium.

The bright spot is Lee Purcell. She portrays Jilly Buck, the governor's smart-mouthed niece who saves Eddie's neck by driving him to safety. That, of course, is after the obligatory car-chase scene, with Marzack shooting up Jilly's white Mercedes.

Thoughtless directing, a Swisscheese screenplay, and middling acting prevent "Eddie Macon's Run" from anything more than *. "Joysticks"

"Joysticks" is currently my candidate foe the worst movie of the year. How one can avoid labels like "plotless" and "mindless" when reviewing this movie is impossible. From double-entendre title to titillating (heavy on first syllable) sex sceens, the film stinks. After plunking down his heavy ticket price, the trapped viewer can afford to make several forays to the popcorn stand -between stagey breast parades -and be none the worst for following the "story".

Story? Production credits list not one, not two, but three screenwriters. From the sound of the dialog, all were called in after the movie

was shot. Director Greydon Clark could not have been working from a prepared script. The actors wander in and out of scenes, disjointed, improvising lines which fall from their lips onto the floor, the furniture, the walls. The situation would be funny if it weren't pathetic.

"Joysticks" is the inevitable outcome of a national phenomenon: the video arcade. Managed by local teen heartthrob Jeff Bailey (Scott) McGinnis), and populated by such bizarre denizens as Dorfus (Jim Greenleaf), a fat, slovenly video addict who had once been class president, and King Vidiot (Jonathan Gries) a purple-haired punker who wears more pancake than most clowns, the arcade is the hangout for the high school crowd.

Trouble arrives in the form of influential businessman Joseph Rutter (Joe Don Baker), who is outraged by the arcade and its effect on his valley-girl daughter Patsy (Corinne Bohrer). Rutter accuses the arcade of being the source of the town's juvenile delinquency. He is determined to close it, employing the aid of his two nitwit nephews, who predictably botch up everyting in an attempt to sabotage the games. Two tame sex scenes are inserted to fuel Rutter's arguments.

The failure of the nephews to destroy the arcade does not dampen Rutter's determination. He hires King Vidiot for the job, promising the punker his own video game. In addition, Rutter appeals to the city fathers.

A special session of the city council is called. The irate Rutter depicts the arcade to the council in a fantasy segment that includes mudwrestling (topless) and plenty of nudity. The outcome of the verbal battle is never in doubt; after all, this is a teen exploitation movie.

Joe Don Baker has fallen a long way since his "Walking Tall" days. No serious actor would take a role like Rutter unless he were desperate for work or broke. Corinne Bohrer

has the most on-screen fun with her eye-popping val-gal gibberish. like I mean who cares?

But,

There's no joy in "joysticks" unless you're into a visual bombardment of breasts. No stars.

CURRENT & RECOMMENDED LIANNA The first film to portray Lesbian coming-out with sensitivity. A masterpiece by Director John Sayles. ****

SOPHIE'S CHOICE Meryl Streep is unexcelled as the WWII survivor who cannot adjust. *****

THE VERDICT Paul Newman in an acting tour-de-force as a down-and-out lawyer trying to win the big one. *****

TOOTSIE Dustin Hoffman dons drag to become TV's hottest soap star.

***

TABLE FOR FIVE Divorced fater Jon Voight tries to get back in touch with his kids on an ocean voyage.

***

C Stonewall Features Syndicate, 1983

KASSAR'S PALAKE

ANNOUNCES

Costial Beer 6 p

EVERY WEDNESDAY in MAY is "BEER BUST" & The "PLAYMATE of the MONTH PAGENT"

Will be moved from the last Friday to the last Wednesday of every month.

SINCE THE DEPARTMENT OF LIQUER CONTROL PROHIBITS CASH VALUE PRIZE CONTESTS, THE PERSON NAMED PLAYMATE OF THE MONTH WILL BE PAID $100.00 FOR PERFORMING A FINAL NUMBER.

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